11.17.2004

Out

Champaign sucks. Its dead trees and brown grass litter this earth.
And it’s cold. Not that good cold that you’d get in Colorado,
but that skin piercing, shoulder hunching pain that’s brought on by the wind.
The only thing worse than the cold is having to wait for the twenty-two in it.
Everyone staring at the dead bark, bouncing up and down, and back and forth
in their feeble attempts to stay warm.

But wait, there is worse…the bus ride.
True the bus itself is warm, but the people are colder than the weather outside.
They are frozen, as in heartless, because most people they see on the bus,
they don’t care about them, yet they act like they’re so glad to see them.
And they will always go out of their way to ask that one damn question:
Hey Jim, you go out this weekend?
Out? Where is out? I’d like to find it. Is it somewhere on Green street?
Why can’t people just say what the question really implies?

Hey Jim, did you and your shady, gelled haired, jeans with sandals wearing, asshole friends get piss drunk Saturday night before you went to Kam’s then CO’s then Clybourne’s but not Tonic, because only townies go there, and then find some whale that had somehow escaped from Seaworld and waddled her way up to Chambana, and take her and her flippers back to your super cool frat house, and then proceed to mount her like a horse but couldn’t tell the difference if she really was a horse or not, and then wake up the next morning realizing if it weren’t for birth control you’d have your own pod of whales around you for the rest of your God given life, and Jim how the hell are you not miserable with your existence and ashamed of everything that you stand for, you vain, self-indulgent prick? Here, let me pop that collar for you.

Of course that’s never said, and the bus ride continues.
Taking a right on Daniel, then another right on fourth, a left on Armory…
all the way until Gregory Hall where I step out from one cold and into another.
Headed to one more bland lecture in a rundown, paint chipped lecture hall…
or maybe I’ll skip class today and go search the Champaign streets for ‘out.’

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